It was the middle of the afternoon. We decided to have lunch at an Indian buffet so I could try some of the dishes. We sat at a small table in the back restaurant. The owner greeted us, the waiter greeted us and I filled my plate with a variey of declicous (although hot) foods. Among the crowd, and almost unnoticed was a man filling the water glasses. He moved quietly from table to table making sure we were all well hydrated.

He stopped at my table, and I wished him a happy and peaceful new year. We began talking and I found myself enjoying the conversation even more than the food. He was from Tibet and spent several months on the bottom of a mountain leading people up the mountain and doing search and rescue missions. He explained how he loved hot Indian food, it kept him warm in the cold climate. I suggested coffee and he laughed and went on to explain the special tea blend they drank. And the food….yak cheese with egg on top. We spoke about Thai food, and about the Dali Lama. I wished the conversation would not have ended so quickly. What, I asked, had brought him here, in the middle of NJ? I will never forget that moment. He smiled, and simply said “karma”. His eyes held peace and acceptance and inner tranquility.

I wonder how many people pass through our lives almost invisibly each day. If we pause just a moment, to stop and hear their story, what amazing things we would hear. What we could learn about ourselves.

So, to answer this week’s question, I wish to make peace with myself. To accept the path I am on, to know that karma has brought me here. To know that I am just where I should be. To truely possess that inner peace that everything is as it should be.



Reverb: Forgiveness

Forgiveness is a theme found throughout the Bible.  We should all forgive each other.  After all, God has forgiven us for all our sins.  Grace is undeserved favor from God regardless of who we are or what we have done.  The scripture tells us that the sun rises each morning on the good and the bad.  Forgiveness is healing, forgiveness is holy, forgiveness is God.  So if you are looking for forgiveness, ask God.  Because you will not find it here.

The words Guilty and Pleasure go so well together, don’t you think?  Like the apple was to Eve…but hopefully my guilty pleasures will have better consequences.  So here we go…MY guilty pleasures, not in any particular order.

1.  Vintage Earrings.  I love to buy vintage earrings.  Big, bold, sparkling and gaudy.  I run to the mirror and try them on and suddenly I’m transformed into Nora Charles from the Thin Man.  My current favorite jewelry maker is Hobe.  I find myself daydreaming, wondering who bought them and where they wore them.  What kind of life did they have and what sequence of events brought those particular earring to me. 

2.  Taking a vacation day from work during a snow storm, staying in bed with my tiny dog Smudge and watching the weather channel.  Always with a container of dog treats and a huge cup of hot tea.  Getting nothing done, just watching the snow fall softly and wondering how anyone would want to be a storm reporter.

3.  Having someone cut you off in traffic and speed by, then seeing them pulled over by the police.  It may not be the same car, but hey, don’t rain on my parade.

4.  Buying a large latte from Starbucks.  Yum….but they cost a “Latte” money, hence the guilt.

5.  Going upstairs to take nap while my in-laws are over and waking up to find they are gone.  I’ll accept the guilt gladly.

Well, that’s it.  My list of guilty pleasures….now yours

I wish to have tea with someone who I truly like, someone I admire.  Someone I would love to spend time with, someone I genuingly like.  Someone I love, someone I trust.  And I would like that someone to be me.  I wish to develop that inner strenght and confidence to value what I have to offer.  To enjoy my own company, to love who I am.


This weekend I was watching a movie, “How Do You Know” with Reese Witherspoon.  The title itself is insightful.  In one part of the movie, she goes to see a therapist and cannot decide whether or not to go in.  Finally she sticks her head in the door and asks for one piece of advice that basically covers everything.  He tell her “figure out what  you want, and learn how to ask for it”.  So I am here, on this blog, asking you to wish with me that I sell my house and am able to buy my new home.  And that that one special buyer is guided my way, our open house is Sunday from 1pm to 4pm.  I wish for a family that will love this house as much as I did when I lived here.  It’s time to move on…a new beginning.

I need a lot more guidance than that….but let’s leave that for another blog.


Mama Don’t Wanna

Mama Don’t Wanna – let others define who I am.

Mama Don’t Wanna – doubt that we will sell our house and be able to move on.




Mama Don’t Wanna – Continue behaviors that are self destructive.  If there is something mama doesn’t like about herself, then change it or move on.



A young woman I know and respect posted this on her blog and I am sending you the link with her permission because it touched me so deeply.  Mama don’t wanna be taken for granted, mama wants to be loved like this.






I wish to enjoy life as I did when I was younger, in my 20’s.  We were very poor, we cooked on an old wood stove but I can still smell the stuffed peppers in that big pot we cooked in. And there was always extra for company.  We didn’t have hot water, but heated the well water on that stove.  But nothing tasted as good as that well water, cold and clean and crisp.  My car didn’t have air conditioning or heat.  In the winter I had to scrape the ice off the inside of the window.  Good times.  It also didn’t have a radio, so each morning on the way to community college I would make up my own weather report, and then sing songs that would be on the radio if I had one.  When my car was in an accident, I just put a bandaid over the dent and life went on.  Everyone, including the gas station attendant, loved that bandaid.  I really enjoyed life, enjoyed just being…

Now, lets just say things are different…  I wish to enjoy life once again.  I learned that it doesn’t really matter how much you have, or don’t have.  It doesn’t matter how successful you are – whatever it is you define success as.  Each of us has the ability to be happy and enjoy each day, each hour, each minute, each moment. 

Oh, how I wish I can enjoy life like that once again.